By: Aaron Adams
Submitted: 2008-07-01 00:26:10 | Word Count: 590
Commitment is such a dirty word when it comes to the average male. Talk about investing into a deeper relationship and you could almost see the man leave his dust behind his immediate flight. Women would really think that men are scared of going one step deeper and will never hear the I do’s in the future. This may not be true in your case but you have to admit that the word commitment has become a major issue in the world of dating.
The best thing to do is to dump all the negativity towards the men and totally blame them for our shattered dreams right? Or so we think. Did it ever cross your mind that it may not be totally his fault alone, could it be yours too? After all, it takes two to tango.
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We may talk and talk forever, telling our men how they need to take care of the relationship, how they can be better persons and how they should take the relationship to the higher level. But the truth is, we cannot tell them what to do. Your man may agree with you just to shut you up but in the end we would still be miserable. We would still complain that the relationship is not growing, simply because our man was forced to commit. The more we talk, the noisier his world becomes and when that happens, he’d pack up and leave.
Cruel? Maybe, but that is the sad reality, sister. Not even you would want to stay in a situation wherein you were forced to be in the first place.
Face it, you may be the most interesting woman in the whole world, but that is not a guarantee that you would keep your man. The moment you commit a major blunder or two, it puts the relationship in a situation that is oh so fragile. The truth is, you can never force him to feel the same way as you do.
The first wrong move is usually this: Boyfriend tells girlfriend how he feels and how he is expecting the relationship to go. Girlfriend automatically jumps in and shares how she feels and what she expects. Their emotions are on the table and they realize that there’s a whole world of difference in each other’s feelings and expectations. One should give way if they do not want to end this blossoming relationship.
The second wrong move begins usually the same way the first wrong move began, but this time, girlfriend tries to change for the boyfriend hoping that everything will work out just fine. She tries to be the girlfriend that she isn t, while at the same time getting unhappier by the minute. Pretending to be somebody you re not is a bad relationship move.
What should you do then?
Go the opposite way!
Stop focusing on what you want and try to see things the way he sees things. If you want him to go deeper into the relationship, learn to talk to him in his own language. Make him see how much you truly care for you and he will definite do the same thing to you.
Remember that men are drawn to honest women. Looking things his way does not mean that you will totally set aside your own feelings. He would want to know how you feel and what you think, he noticed you didn’t he? Learn his love language and help him go deeper one step at a time.
